I don't know if I was raped or not?

I only use to see my dad when I was little, probably until I was 6 years old- then he kinda left me and my mom, only coming around every once in a while. I haven't seen him for at least 4 years but now I'm 14 and I'm starting to have memories of him raping me.... when I was 12 I started becoming disgusted at the sight on a mans hand and I would even vomit if it became to repulsive for me to handle, that year I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety so now I'm on medication. I can only remember all the vulgar feelings and details of when and IF he did rape me.... I can see my facial expression and his through the whole memory, the only thing is I don't know if my mind is telling me the truth or if this really did happen.... And before I bring it up to my mom I want opinions ....because my mom will freak out even if I say the word rape. It's making me paranoid and depressed, I can't sleep at night, and I have night-mares about it... My memory just isn't clear enough for me to believe though, so I'm really confused. It's got me so down that I almost let myself fail the 8th grade, I started to not care and I started losing my friends until I realized that I need to figure things out and that I can't let something like this ruin my whole life and I know if I have a distorted reality and I open my mouth I can really make my dads life horrible... I can really hurt people if I say something like this and it's not even true....I really need some advice...

No Other Gospel Catholics?

I am a Christian. I do not need any teachings from the catholic church. I have God and the Bible, that is all I need. There is nothing in the catholic church worth listing to, instead I listen to God and what He says is the truth.

Could you check my grammer please?

You're missing quite a few the's. Don't put a the as the first word though haha. But it should be the heart of manhattan. Reread it outloud to yourself and anytime you would say the when you're talking, add it in. Some of them are probably just typos:)

Guess my zodiac sign?

Im really loud and I like to have fun. Im independent. I'm usually an over achiever and I am known to get what I want. I usually try to be the boss of everything. I cant do one thing for a very long time. I get jealous sometimes and im pretty passionate about things i love. i have a pretty bad temper and i snap, but five minutes later i usually get myself together and forget what happened.

Wierd Dream or something else?

I woke up this morning cuz I heard a loud voice tell me to wake up cuz its 3:25 AM. I woke up out of a great sleep. I looked at my phone like I always do when I wake up. It was exactly 3:25 AM. This is sooo wierd and I have been puzzled over it all day long. This isnt the first time that I have dreamed about something and immediately woke up to have it happen. What's wrong with me????

Where would I find cute DD bras?

So I'm about to turn fifteen, and of course, this is one of the only times in my life when I can get away with wearing pretty, brightly colored bras. Only problem is that I wear a 36DD. I'm not fat or anything - it's genetics. Runs in the family. Anyways, I have three bras right now, and they're white, beige, and black. The "teen" bras at the stores really only go up to a C cup, and I can't afford to buy myself Victoria's or Frederick's. What are some places where I could buy myself pretty bras that would actually fit?

Ghosts and demons in my dreams oh my!?! INTERPRETING DREAMS!?

ITs just a dream....I've had bad dreams 2 but its just your concious lol i think that's how u spell it...